Letters Never Sent - Scathing Truths Never Shared with the Recipient

Letter Details: Call me when YOU grow up...

Category: Crushes & Obsessions

Description: I've been dating this older guy (substantially older) on and off for two years and recently he has completely called off everything and wants to be "just friends"... and tells me that we were wrong because he is too old... wtf?

Mike,
Did it take you long enough to figure this out? You decided after what... the 50th time we've probably slept together that maybe we weren't right for each other because you are "too old"? Seriously? I would rather have you tell me that I was just a good fuck... We were friends for so long!
The first time I met you, I knew that I should just stay away from you. You were everything that I had been looking for. Especially since you had been married and divorced no less than three times. Something had to be wrong. We kept running in to each other in weird places. After seeing you reading the same book I was, I couldn't resist discussing it. It was quite possibly the best and worst mistake I had ever made. I was soooo naive.
We were friends for over five months before even thinking of a relationship. I knew that as soon as you grabbed my hand in that bar, that I was hopelessly lost. You ARE everything I was looking for. On my birthday, when you told me that you wished I was older, it broke my heart and made me want you so bad at the same time. Was it a lie? Was all that noble stuff just a lie to get me into bed? You opened doors, refused to let me pay for anything, walked me home, everything a man should do for his girlfriend (which btw I refrained from calling myself your girlfriend until my birthday when you asked what a boyfriend should get for his girlfriend)... Was it all a facade?
Now, you tell me that you just want to be friends, that if anyone ever found out (which again, you were not exactly the one keeping it under wraps there Mister) you would "crawl off and die". You tell me that people offer to talk to me, because I'm obsessed... but when they aren't around you tell me how much you value my friendship. People think I'm a stalker, and all I'm trying to do is rekindle the friendship we had before.
Remember on Spring break when we sat outside in that inflatable boat and you sang me that stupid song just to make me laugh. You told me stuff that I'm quite sure you have never told anyone, even your wives. And I told you things that I have never even thought about telling my best friends.
Remember when we were best friends. Remember when you told that man in the Joe's that you met your best friend when you came back to college, and it was me. Now, I can't even go into Joe's with my friends now, and not akward if you are there. My friends feel sorry for me because they know that I love you more than anything and that if given the chance, I would make you mine.
WTF, Mike? Seriously? Why did you wait so long? You say that you don't care what other people think, but you do! You do more than I do, and I'm a goddamn girl, for Christsakes!
The worst is when I try to call and you don't answer. You always tell me to call you two or three times, because you may not be by the phone. But then, you make sure to throw in my face that I'm the ONLY one who calls and that I call ALL the time. Which is a lie.. But I never call you out. You tell people I'm obsessed and that I must have a crush on you, but I never tell people that you are the only person that I've slept with. Or that you used to not be able to sleep without talking to me. Or that one morning you texted me and said you had a bad dream about the scissors chasing you again, and I comforted you and told you that it would be completely irrational for a giant pair of scissors to be chasing you in real life.
Really, I want closure. And upon telling you this, all we did was sleep together, again. (Also, you tell me we can't hang out alone anymore because we always end up sleeping together, and you don't want to sleep with me, but when we do hang out alone, you always start it. The one time I told you no, you looked so hurt and offended... and I wanted it so much anyways, so we did)
Why did you end it? Because if you really would have had a problem in the first place, then you wouldn't have started this up... And no, I did NOT make the first move, I in no way provoked you. Although I did pray every night that you would initiate something. I still don't want to feel like you used me. I don't believe that you did.
Was there another woman? I would be ok with that. I mean, I would be insanely jealous and hate her for eternity, but I would understand. I have gotten chubby, but it's because I was so happy.
Or was it because someone told my parents and they were miffed about the fact that you're older? Well, it doesn't really matter what they think.No, really it doesn't matter what they think. Considering my dad is quite a bit older than my mom, and they let my brothers make bad decisions, it's a bit hypocrytical of them.
Maybe it was one of your friends... Did they say something? Because to my face they seemed to like me. Especially your friend Carlo, who btw hit on me no less than three times in your presence. You seemed pretty happy that he was so accepting... Maybe that was just a lie too...
All I want is for you to tell me the truth. Well, not really... What I really want is for you to admit that you were wrong and that you want me back. Instead of hiding away and being too busy all the time.
I guess I should be thanking you though. You helped me to grow, even if I've grown cynical of men. You helped me to mature and realize that people do appreciate me for who I am. And since you I have been hit on by many guys, dated three... Compared them to you, and then realized that they (in no way) measure up to what I've had.
I want to hate you, because more than likely, you did use me and you are a fucking douche... but I can't. And even after writing this stupid letter, I am going to call you tomorrow and wish you good luck on your finals.
I love you, you stupid man.